1. I had a lovely time out and about last Sunday on a wildflower walk around Forrestdale Lake. Being spring, the wildflowers were out, looking colourful and inviting. I just wish I could remember their names—my memory isn’t what it used to be, and the Latin names won’t stick. Fortunately, people were very forgiving of my attempts at identifying species, and no one seemed to mind if I got my Grevillea and my Hakea muddled.
2. I worry about memory loss—my father and his mother had dementia, and I fear developing it, too. Every time I forget something—like the Latin name of a plant, or where I put the car keys, or if I locked the back door, I worry that it’s starting.
3. I worry, too, when I leave my wallet at the self-serve section of Coles, Mosman Park, and walk out and drive home without it, and don’t even notice until the next day …
4. Thank you, Coles, Mosman Park, for returning my wallet with all the cash intact.
5. My children continue to grow up, as children do, and our second daughter has only fifteen days left at school—yes, she’s counting. After eight consecutive years, we attended the final Concerto Concert in which one of our daughters was involved.
The Orchestra played twenty-one items, most of them difficult concerti—huge kudos to them. Our daughter dressed up and had her hair and make-up professionally done, and when she walked onto the stage, I felt a lump in my throat.
How could this:
Become this:
6. Meanwhile our elder daughter started a blog, and I’ve had a lovely time reading her posts and enjoying her quirky sense of humour.
7. My novel is sailing more smoothly. The sails aren’t billowing, so it’s not going fast, but I’m enjoying taking my time. It’s easier to write now because I think I know where I’m headed. I’ve had problems with one of the characters—initially, she was all bad, simply horrid, with no redeeming features at all. In trying to sort her out, I swung the pendulum too far the other way, and she became too nice—insipid was probably the best way to describe her. Now, I think I’ve given her back her dark side, but hopefully the reader can understand her and why she behaves as she does.
8. I’ve recently tossed one of my most powerful scenes, and some of my best prose, into the ‘Out Takes’ bin. I think—I hope—the story is better for it.
I’ve realised a couple more things about novel writing:
9. It’s all about telling the story. That sounds obvious, but I was such a rookie, I wanted to keep some scenes because I liked them or I felt they were powerful, even though holding onto them actually didn’t serve the story at all—in fact, it lessened it.
I’ve had to delete many darlings—phrases, scenes, chapters, and some of my best writing. It’s felt like severing a limb, but, as I say, it’s all about the story, not the author.
10. (Just quietly, I’ve deleted them from this book, but I’ve kept them for future stories. Hehe!)
12. Sometimes, as I read my writing, I hear my ‘throwaway’ sentences, my clichés, the lazy word I wrote as a place-holder but haven’t corrected. It reminds me of when my kids practise their music and I hear them skimming over notes, distracted, just playing or singing without thinking about it. And just as every note in music counts, so does every sentence in writing. Every word of every sentence.
So, I’m going through my novel with a fine-tooth comb, looking at every sentence and every word, trying a different one, or a different order. And sometimes when I change a word or phrase, I make a discovery and see something I hadn’t seen before—a deeper layer or a hidden truth.
13. That’s the other thing I’ve realised about the way I write—I need to take my time. I like discovering all these layers and truths and nuances, and I can already see how much better I’ve made my novel through this painstaking process called ‘editing’.
However, all of this requires patience.
So. Much. Patience.
But it’s where the magic happens!
~
Here are some photos from my wildflower walk last weekend:
Jacksonia sternbergiana
Philotheca spicata
Philotheca spicata
Caladenia flava (Cowslip orchid)
Caladenia flava
Chaemaescilla corymbosa (Salt and pepper)
Hakea
Stirlingia latifolia
Beautiful wildflower photos Louise. I studied Latin up till Year 12 and despite that I struggle with remembering botanical names too. In fact I hate to confess how much I have forgotten.
But the real gem of your post is the revelation that you need to take time to write and it sounds like you are enjoying it so much more as a result. Enjoy every precious minute as the process is important too.
Have a great writing week
Jacquie x
Thanks, Jacquie! I don’t think I’d heard so many Latin terms being bandied about since I stopped working in a hospital! And I’m just taking my time with this rewrite—there’s no hurry. I hope you enjoy a bit of downtime this week after your huge edit!
It is an extremely weird feeling not to be editing every spare second! Have channelled my under-utilised creative energy into drafting a blog post instead.
Can’t wait to see what you come up with!
Jxxx
Good on you for writing a blog post—can’t wait to read it! I’m happy that you’re enjoying some downtime, and I can’t wait until this rewrite is done and dusted, and I can join you!
Actually I am a bit jealous of you still having your writing baby to work on! x
I’m not jealous of me! I can’t wait to finish this rewrite …
beautiful photos – and an interesting read. Your book will be a masterpiece!
Thanks for visiting, Joyce! I don’t know about it being a masterpiece, but it will be better than it is at the moment!
Lovely post Louise and great to hear about your gorgeous girls. My daughter had a blog for several years. I loved it … it was a privilege to be able to read her perspectives on life (and chocolate).
I’m glad your deleted novel bits have been saved for future possibilities. You can always declutter later if you find you have moved on with your writing.
Is your daughter’s blog still up? I’d slip over and read it if it was still there. I’m loving reading Izzy’s musings for so many reasons, including that I’m glad she’s still writing and doing things other than studying.
As for my deleted scenes, I think some might be able to be turned into short stories. Or I’ll save them for Novel #2!
Short stories sounds good! I love those.
As for her blog, yes: http://wayfaringchocolate.com
You’ll see it morphed a lot over time. At the beginning there was a lot more about life, then she got a reputation as a chocolate reviewer which we family people didn’t find as interesting, but she interspersed those with more life-oriented posts too. She stopped a year or so ago, then started again this year but only wrote a couple of posts before stopping again. She went to the USA/Europe in 2009, came back, then went to USA/Canada in 2012, then came back. She’s now in Melbourne.
I had a look at your daughter’s, btw — will check again when she’s got going a bit more but it looks good.
Sue, your daughter’s blog is terrific—please let her know! I’ll go back and read more, and send a link to Izzy, to show her what she can do.
I understand why she went down the chocolate pathway—blogging about your life takes a lot out of you: constantly worrying about the next topic for a post, and often feeling vulnerable. Posting about chocolate, or posting some photos, is much ‘safer’ and frees up time and mental energy.
Thanks for the link to your daughter’s blog. I’m about to head back there!
I will Louise. Glad you like it. I’ve subscribed to your daughter’s … Great hearing what this new generation is thinking.
Me too, Sue. I’m so optimistic for this new generation—they’re articulate, empathic, confident, and I think they’ll sort out many of the problems we, and the generations before us, created!
PS. I subscribed to your daughter’s blog on my Feedly, so I’m ready whenever she is!
They really are … I don’t think my daughter will do it again, any time soon, but you never know!
That’s okay. Even if takes a year it two before she goes back, it doesn’t matter. ????
Yes, that’s the joy of blogging isn’t it – you can do what you want, when you want, with no publisher, editor, etc breathing down your neck!
Your photography and your story telling are I sure as equally beautiful. Ps. Susan M loved your story x
Thanks, Rae. That’s lovely of Susan M to say that—I hope she loves this rewrite even more!
The snapshots of your life are always lovely.to read and see. Thanks for sharing. Continued success with your editing.
Thanks, Penny! As far as editing goes, I’ll just keep plodding on …
Stunning photos, Louise, you are so talented. Before and after pictures of your daughter are amazing. What a gorgeous lady she is. You must be so proud. As to forgetting things, my husband does that all the time. His mum had dementia, so he worries too when he can’t remember where he left his keys or glasses… Looking for things is a common activity in this household. As to editing, every word resonated with me. The parallel with music really struck cord with me. I used to play a violin as a child, and I do remember playing mindlessly sometimes. I can see how that habit plays out in my writing sometimes. Thank you for this fab post. Love your writing so much!
I completely understand your husband’s fears. It started more after Dad died, and these days, I seem to be forgetting a lot of things—although my husband says it’s not that I forget, it’s that it doesn’t register in the first place because I’m always distracted, thinking of my novel!
I’m glad the music parallel resonated with you. When my kids play their instruments, I hear them skim over a bar or two, or play it as if it’s boring, or while they’re distracted looking out the window—we all do that as it’s hard to concentrate 100% of the time. But when they play as if they’re telling a story and every note is important, the difference is amazing.
It’s the same when writing, and reading. I skim over sections, thinking, Yes, yes, I know that bit’s okay, but when I read it closely, looking at every word, I realise it can be made better. And it works—treating every word as if it’s important elevates the section as a whole.
As usual, Louise, yo have depicted a part of your life that is totally charming and understandable. I don’t have the patience to ediit and re-edit and take my stories apart. I am sure they woudl be better if I had your talent. Truly enjoy your photos, but am actually more interested in your writing process. Thanks for sharing. Hugs.
Betty, you mightn’t need to edit and re-edit the way I do! I don’t think I’m a natural writer—my brain’s good at concepts, but it struggles to find words, so I write quite simply. When I read it back, it has no rhythm and reads like morse code! So I need to edit, to find the right word and shape the sentences so they flow. I think I used the wrong metaphor when I likened it to sailing—it’s more like rowing, there’s a lot of effort involved!
I admire your perseverance, Louise. That you should murder all those darlings. It’s such a painful thing to do, and quite the contrast with your other darlings, your children who flourish under your care. Whenever I read your blog I’m reminded of the painful story you’ve told of your childhood, and the fact that you have moved so far is simply awesome, quite apart from the successes of the next generation.
Thanks for your lovely comment, Elisabeth. ‘Murder’ is the appropriate word! Although, some of them might be reincarnated, but in a different life form …
One day, I’ll write about how hard it’s been not to repeat the patterns of the past, and the work I’ve done not to do that. I think I struck gold with my father, and I also had a lovely grandmother, his mother. Their love was unconditional, and it was obviously enough to get me through. Without their example, I don’t think I would have been able to parent my own children.
Love the photos and all your thoughts. And your daughter, such a beautiful young woman! My own daughter is starting to change, to become more grown up and you do wonder how it happens – one day a chubby toddler, the next tall and slender, dancing around the room. And murdering the darlings is a tough thing to do – just like you, I have a special place I keep them, just in case I need to ‘resurrect’ them again 😉
Watching our children develop is one of the true wonders of this life of ours, isn’t it? It never fails to amaze me, even though, I know they all do it!
And yes, I believe in reincarnation when it comes to our writing darlings!