I haven’t done this for a while, so here’s a wee update:
1. Son #1 arrived home yesterday after a twelve-day camp. I know I sound like a soppy mother, but the sight of him in a beanie, sunburnt and unwashed, and smiling at me from the other side of the road ranks right up there in my highlights of the year.
(Other highlights of the year include January, when Daughter #2 returned after six weeks in France, and July, when Daughter #1 returned from Melbourne after not seeing her for four months. I might be wrong, but I’m noticing a theme to my highlights …)
2. Son #1’s Camp was a long one, involving all 180+ Year Ten boys at his school, and is considered a rite of passage. Over the twelve days, they walked more than 200km, climbed mountains (for Tassie people, Western Australian mountain = hill), kayaked down rivers, planted trees for reforestation, and cooked their own meals.
The meals cooked by my son’s group seem to have been his biggest disappointment of the trip. All I can say is, they must have been really bad because with my cooking, the bar’s pretty low …
3. Before the boys went, we were asked to write affirmation letters to our sons. It was a secret, and towards the end of the camp, the boys were given their letters and sent off on their own for three hours, to read what their parents had written, and write in their journals.
One of the first things my son said when I picked him up was, ‘Thank you for the letter’.
It was one of the easiest things I’ve ever been asked to write, and it said nothing I hadn’t already told him verbally, but it made me think I should write to my children more often.
4. Good Intention #356: Write affirmation letters to my kids.
5. After arriving home, Son #1’s order of proceedings went: Food-Shower-Food-Computer Games-Food-Xbox-Food-Piano-Food-Bed. Nice to know he hasn’t changed.
6. In another rite of passage, this coming week we have Graduation for Daughter #2. She’s finished exams and school, and it’s hit me that half of our children have left school! I know I should have realised already that I’m no longer a mother of young children, but it still feels as if it’s passed too quickly, and all these end-of-eras are coming around too fast …
7. There’s so much I want to write about Daughter #2, and I will, but that topic really deserves its own post. I want to write about all that I’ve learnt through mothering this child. This daughter is very different to her older sister, and as a parent, I found that surprising and, at times, difficult. I thought I’d done the parenting gig before, and done it quite successfully, so if I did the same things again, it would work out again. But, it didn’t, and she let me know in no uncertain terms—the repaired plaster outside her door is a testament to the number of times it’s been slammed. I was rather devastated as I’d tried really hard to be a good mother, made it my life’s aim, in fact. I wanted to blame her, but deep down, I also knew that, as the adult, it was up to me to fix it. I won’t write anymore about it today, except to say that there was a solution and it was easier than I thought …
8. We attended a Movie Premiere at a friend’s house last weekend. We decked out in penguin suits to watch our kids perform music from the movies. At interval, the bewigged ‘Candy’ interviewed us on the red carpet as we sipped sparkling, then we reconvened for Sculthorpe’s ‘Kakadu’ and the world premiere of a home movie.
I can’t remember the exact title of this world-class film, however the plot had something to do with the evil Svetlana chasing down all packets of Red Rock Deli chips that weren’t Salt and Vinegar. As you can imagine, we were rolling on the floor with laughter on the edge of our seats for this action-packed thriller-on-a-budget, which had been scripted, filmed, and produced within 24-hours.
But the highlight of the evening was the 3-course dinner for thirty that our friend had prepared. We sat at a long table in their garden and ate by candlelight under the stars. It was a really special meal.
Son #2 played ‘Schindler’s List’:
Then joined ‘Candy’ (aka ‘Helen’) on the red carpet:
As did we:
9. Finally, here are my photos. This week, they’re from around our home and neighbourhood:
Two of my favourite subjects, even though they won’t sit still:
They were so hot, hence the tongues, and I can’t let them off their leads because of the bird life at the Lake—they’d love to chase those ducks. (In fact, Gretel did one day, with our next-door-neighbour’s little girl still holding the lead. She had to let it go, or she would have ended up in the middle of the lake, too. Luckily, the ducks escaped—they can fly and Gretel can’t.)
Our street is lined by old, old gums, and the one on our verge sometimes appears to droop with its age.
But it has incredibly rich colours:
And intricate gnarls in its trunk and branches:
And when it blossoms and the sunlight catches its leaves, it looks young again:
To finish, some more of the daisies:
Now, I’ll go and write that blog post about ‘How I Learnt To Be A Better Mother Because Of My More Difficult Child’.
Louise, what a week you had! Thanks so much for sharing it. Your pictures and your words captured those moments perfectly. How proud you mist be of your family! And what fun to be on the red carpet and see a world premiere movie. Well done!
typo alert: “how proud you must be of your family (though you might get mist-y thinking about them,) 🙂 p,
No worries—I understood what you meant. And yes, they do make me misty eyed with pride at times!
Thank you, Penny! It’s been a lovely week, albeit hectic, as they are at this time of year, and the week coming up will be even more so. It’s very nice to have Son #1 home again, as you do worry that they’ll be safe on these long excursions. Despite its challenges, he really enjoyed it. As for the movie, we consider ourselves blessed to have been in the audience for such a prestigious premiere! It was a hoot!
Affirmation letters for children sound amazing. What a great idea. So many milestones this year. Glad you had an amazing week. Oh, and you have a beautiful and well-loved family, Louise. Very heart-warming to see the pics and read the update.
Affirmation letters are a beautiful concept—I know a few parents who really went to town, and involved aunts, uncles, and grandparents, and so forth! Some took it as a sign of their boys becoming men, and shared things with them as adults for the first time. As I say, our letter didn’t say anything we hadn’t already told him a hundred times, but I don’t know that either of us had ever sat and written a long letter to him with all of these things in it. It obviously meant a lot to him, because it was one of the first things he brought up when I picked him up. It would be good to make it a ritual!
Wow, Louise, you are giving me ideas (and my kids don’t even read yet!) I’m thinking perhaps to write one a year to start with. At the moment, I put together photobooks and videos pulling together the memories from each year. Maybe, this year I add a letter to that collection for them to read when they are older.
I think that sounds wonderful—do it! As I was writing the post, I was actually getting ideas, too. I thought I might write them letters and post them as it’s always so nice to get snail mail. And for birthdays, I might give them a proper letter along with their card. Because you can never give a child too much affirmation of all the good that’s in them!
What a fabulous week, Louise. Two of my children went on a survival camp in grade 10. I think it’s very character building but I almost asked my son Jack to sit in the boot on the way home he stunk so much. I remember picking my two eldest sons up from the airport after nine month stints in Italy on gap years. Nine months is too long for a mother to go without seeing her children. I’m looking forward to read about your solution with your daughter. I know exactly what you mean about how using the same parenting style on different personalities doesn’t guarantee the same outcome!
Tim didn’t even smell—they hadn’t showered, but they’d swum, and he said he remembered anti-perspirant *most* days! It is character-building, and it’s one of those things that you set as a challenge, and are proud of yourself when you’ve got through it.
I agree, nine months is way too long to go without seeing your kids! Shouldn’t be allowed!
Oh, parenting! Brings out the best in us … and the worst! You’d think that coming from the same parents, same gene pool, same house, same values, that your kids would be similar—but they’re not!
I’ve almost forgotten those days of school endings – end of year 6, end of year 10 (because here in the ACT you go on to college), end of college, and then of course the big end of university. You’re right, they come so fast. And now, next year it will be ten years since my youngest started university. My oh my.
Laughed at your note to Tassie people re WA mountains. And love your daisy photos.
I know it’s a cliché, but it does come around too fast. When I used to hear it as a young mother, I didn’t believe it! But it’s true.
No, there aren’t any ‘real’ mountains here in WA. Nor ‘real’ waterfalls either! There’s still much to see that’s beautiful though.
And I loved my daisies. I think I’ll make a habit of popping jars of them about the house!
Funnily enough, most cliches have a basis in truth, though the novel I’m currently reading does have a wonderful quote about cliches … maybe I’ll post it in advance as a teaser. Watch out for it.
Oh yes, I agree there’s plenty to see that’s beautiful in those geologically ancient parts of Australia like WA and the Centre.
I love daisies too – my wedding bouquet was daisies and jonquils – yellow, white and green.
Please post the quote, Sue—I’ll keep my eye out!
I agree—this ancient flat and brown land of ours isn’t as boring as it looks from a distance, but is full of colour and life. And hills!
Your wedding bouquet sounds lovely and ‘fresh’! I went for simplicity in my bouquet, too—cream roses.
Louise, you express your emotions so beautifully and when I read about your week it was like chatting with you in person. How I would love to be able to meet you in person along with the other members of our writing group. Hugs. You do good work as a mother as well as a writer.
Thank you, Betty. I actually write these posts as if I’m chatting to the person on the other end. The words flow quite easily, just like a conversation.
I hope to meet you in person one day, too. I *will* make it to the US, I’m determined. Maybe when my book’s published there! 😉
Many thanks for your lovely words.
What a wonderful read. We had to write an affirmation letter for our son earlier this year. Like you, there was nothing in it that I haven’t said but he was so delighted by it and for a few days thought I was the best . Perhaps I should write one every day.
Thanks for visiting! I’m definitely going to write them more often, and I even thought I might post them so they get snail mail—they love snail mail! And it won’t ever do any harm to receive a letter telling you how nice you are!
I loved this post, Louise. It has a beauty and simplicity and was a pleasure to read. I love your highlights of the year, too 🙂 I must admit that my daughter’s smile is the highlight of my year as well, and I really like the idea of writing affirmation letters to our children. It sounds to me as though you are a pretty amazing mum already.
That old gum tree is pretty awesome too – when we were in California recently, the smell and sight of gumtrees reminded us all of Australia, especially my husband. It’s a very evocative scent.
Smells do that, don’t they? Our olfactory centre is located in our limbic system, right near our memory and emotions. That’s why smells in particular are evocative. I love the scent of eucalypts, too, especially the peppermint gums. We have a patch of native bush at the end of our street, and the smell is so uplifting every time I walk through it. I can imagine how much it would remind your husband of home!
The affirmation letter has made me think we should do it more often. I know how much it would lift our kids, any kids. It’s nice to know your parents love you and are proud of you.
I’m not an amazing mum, but I’ve really tried my hardest to be as good as I can be. Sometimes, that’s meant changing how I do a few things!
Thanks again for commenting. x
When we lived in Melbourne, I used to walk along the Yarra to work and the smell of the gum trees, especially after the rain, was so sharp and fresh. I loved that walk for a lot of reasons, and so that’s what I think of now when I smell eucalypts. It makes sense that our scent organs are so close to those of memory…
It’s a gorgeous smell, especially after rain. A natural pick-me-up. Yes, I remember when I first heard that smell/memory/emotion are all just about touching each other in the brain, it explained a lot! Some smells just bring all the memories back, don’t they? Like the smell of freshly sharpened Staedtler pencils reminds me of my first day of school, and I remember it as if it was yesterday.
Oh, yes, and the smell of markers too 🙂 And I find I am using smell more in my writing as well, when I describe a character. My husband says I have a nose like a bloodhound so I guess it must be important to me LOL.
A nose like a bloodhound! I wish I did—then again, with teenage boys in the house, it’s probably better I don’t!
I go to a fortnightly writing group, and each time as we start to write, the facilitator reminds us to include the senses. If the writing’s stuck, she says, just go back to the senses and start describing not just what we see, but what we hear, feel, smell, taste. Whenever I (remember to) do that, rarely does it fail to take my writing somewhere …
Your writing group sounds great – I do think smell and sound, as much as what the character sees, helps to set the scene for the reader. I might try that exercise when I get stuck…
It’s a great exercise. You probably do it automatically, but I often have to remind myself. I use it, too, when I’ve written a scene that feels bland—I go back through it bearing in mind what the character would be seeing, hearing, touching, tasting (if necessary), and especially smelling. It’s really useful for bringing a scene to life.
Oh, I have to remind myself too. I often get too caught up in what they are seeing or feeling, and have to remember to add other strokes to the canvas. Scent is a really useful one 🙂
I get caught up in the seeing and what they’re thinking, too. And trying to craft the perfect sentence … 🙂
Writing is hard! And anyone who thinks otherwise hasn’t done it 🙂
Very true! 🙂